薩爾薩 'Salsa.'
字幕來源：TLF字幕組
翻校人員：Hello Agnes
后期：Fa1c0n
像來自外星球一樣 'It was like something from another planet,
音樂 激情 節奏 'the music, the passion, the rhythm.
一穿上這雙鞋 就不想脫下來了 'Once I put those shoes on, I never wanted to take them off.
我的腳后跟像有火一樣 'It was like I had fire in my heels.
我像個不停地跳薩爾薩的機器人 'I was an unstoppable salsa machine,
拿了一個又一個獎杯 trophy after trophy after trophy,
都是由導師羅恩·帕菲特指導的 'all overseen by my mentor, Ron Parfitt,
他是個偉大的教練 嚴厲的混蛋 'great coach, hard bastard.'
大多數人認為跳舞用的是腳 胡扯 Most people think you dance with your feet. Bollocks.
跳舞用的是心 You dance with your heart. You dance with el corazon.
布魯斯有顆野牛般的心 And Bruce, Bruce has got a heart like a bison
有大象般的氣概 and balls like an elephant.
在我身邊的是我妹妹 也是我舞伴 薩姆 'And by side, my sister and dance partner, Sam.'
霹靂 霹靂 霹靂 Thunder, Thunder, Thunder,
霹靂貓 嘿 "ThunderCats". Ho!
十分 Ten!
我們巡回比賽 'We travelled the circuit,
貝克郡 白金漢郡 貝德福郡 'Berkshire, Buckinghamshire, Bedfordshire,
我們拿下了所有冠軍 除了...全國冠軍 'We won it all, every title going, except one -the Nationals.
古巴跟舞鞋 絲綢襯衫 上千手工縫制的亮片 'Cuban heels, silk shirt, 1,000 hand-sewn sequins.
我準備好了爭霸世界 'I was ready to take on the world.
但有時薩爾薩卻把你拋出好遠 'But sometimes salsa just throws you out for a spin.'
臭小子 襯衫不錯啊 Oi, wanker, nice shirt.
過來 Come here!
我不知道自己是在哪愛上薩爾薩的 'I don't know where I was when I fell in love with salsa.
但我確切地知道自己在哪開始不愛了 'But I know exactly where I was when it stopped.'
你以為你是誰 巴利·曼尼路 Who do you think you are? Barry Manilow?
女士們 先生們 歡迎來到全國賽... 'Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Nationals... '
那晚我沒有露面 'I never turned up that night.
我打電話給他 說"薩爾薩是娘們跳的" 'I just phoned him and told him, "Salsa's for pussies."
我覺得我腳后跟的火 'And I guess that fire in my heels,
熄滅了 'it just went out.'
片名 《古巴浪人》
25年后
天哪 Oh, dear.
GFD工程 'GFD Engineering,
西歐高端產品的首要供應商 'Western Europe's premier supplier of high-end manufacturing
五星級工業機器 'and five-star industrial machinery... '
-自行車 -天哪 -Bike. -Oh, God.
為什么我們每天早上都得這樣 Why do we have to do this every morning?
這不是自行車 It's not a bike.
現在的確不是 Not now it's not,
但我在監控上看到你把它折疊了 but I just watched you transform it on the monitor.
我承認 在外面它是自行車 Look, I'll admit, for a while outside it was a bike,
但現在 砰砰砰 看看 but now, piff, paff, poof, look at that.
這是行李 It's a piece of luggage.
自行車 Bike.
-媽的 -朱厄妮塔 早上好 -Fucking hell. -Juanita, buenos dis.
布魯斯 不是吧 Bruco, no.
不是吧 No, no.
你來這干嘛的 今天怎么穿成這樣 What have you gone for here? This what you're wearing today?
我騎自行車來穿的 I cycle in wearing it.
你看著衣櫥 想著 You just looked in your wardrobe and thought,
"我今天想穿得像蠟封奶酪一樣" "I think I'll just look like a Maxi Babybel today."
是這樣嗎 Was that it?
-你剃胡子了嗎 -沒有 -Have you shaved? -No.
抬起來...涂點在你胡茬上 Just lift your... Some jam on your stubble.
別在大家面前這樣 Don't do that in front of everyone.
今天是個大日子 兄弟 It's a big day, a big day, man.
今早新老板上任 Got the new boss starting this morning.
聽說他是個厲害角色 I hear he's a ball buster.
顯然我聽說她是個女的 Well, I hear apparently he is a she.
你是說變性人 You mean like a tranny?
-不是 -不是 -No. -No.
-女人 -女人 -A woman. -Oh... a woman.
什么樣的女人會想經營 What kind of a woman wants to run a company
專營重工業機器的公司 that specialises in heavy industrial machinery?
我想我知道 I think I know.
大塊頭 很多毛 Big, hairy.
-大塊頭呆子 -野獸 -Big sort of big lump. -A beast.
可能跟你絕配 Might be perfect for you.
不管怎樣 我要去停車了 Hmm. Anyway, listen, this bike's not going to park itself.
上面見 好吧別遲到了 I'll see you up there, OK? Don't be late.
我不喜歡我的團隊遲到 I don't like my team to be late.
這樣不專業 明白嗎 廢物 It's unprofessional, isn't it, bum flap?
他們在那兒呢 默克和明蒂 There they are, Mork and Mindy.
海倫 Uh, Helen.
你沒聽到嗎 Can you not hear that?
-你好 布魯斯·加勒特 -你好 布魯斯 -Hello, Bruce Garrett. -'Hello, Bruce.
你喜歡恐怖片嗎 'Do you like scary films? '
-什么 -我在模仿《驚聲尖叫》 -What? -'I'm doing "Scream".
-你真的相信了 -嗨 德魯 -'You totally bought it.' -Oh, hi, Drew.
他們要把野獸放出來了 布魯斯 'They're going to unleash the beast, Bruce.'
誰不愿意用清澈湛藍的太平洋海水 Who wouldn't swap the crystal blue waters of the Pacific
換取泰晤士無窮無盡的泥灘 是吧 for the endless silted mud flats of old Father Thames? Am I right?
但愿我能證明我當銷售經理 Uh, and hopefully I can prove to you that I'm a better sales manager
當得比公共演說家好 than I am a public speaker.
我打賭她有和鞋子搭配的包 I bet she's got the bag to go with them shoes.
-啊 -她啊 美國賤人臉 -Mm? -Her, United States of Bitch Face.
"我可是美國人"小姐 Little Miss I'm-So-American.
好了 我不說了 我們喝酒吧 OK, I'm going to stop talking now. Let's all have a drink.
聽聽 Hear, hear.
你說得對 知道嗎 You were right, you know?
她的確是個女人 She is a woman.
還是個這么漂亮的女人 哇哦 And what a woman. Wow-wow-wee-wah.
我要像運奶車撞墻一樣濺她一身 I would make a splash inside that like a milk truck hitting a wall.
能不能別...別在餐桌前說這種事 Listen, can we not... Can we not talk ejaculate at the buffet table?
看看她 看看我的冰雪皇后 Look at her, though. Look at my little dairy queen, uh?
看到沒你也看了 You see? You had little a look, too.
-酸奶黃瓜醬 -真機靈 -Oh, some tzatziki. -Oh, that's cute.
真可愛 布魯斯 沒關系 你可以看 No, it is. It's adorable, Bruce. That's all right. You can look.
但別碰她 會尷尬的 是吧 But don't touch 'cause that would be embarrassing, wouldn't it?
-留給專家吧 -當然 -Just leave it to the experts. -Sure.
-性專家 我剛造的詞 -挺不錯的 -The sexperts. I just coined that. -That's quite good, actually.
-還用說 -別這樣 -Wasn't it? -Don't!
工作時間結束了 混蛋們 Work time is over, motherfuckers.
我想我們都知道這意味著什么 Ah, I think we know what that means.
這意味著 派對時間到啦 That means, oh, oh, it's party time.
沒錯 That's right.
誰想跟跳舞熊玩 Who wants to come and play with the dancing bear?
這位...這位想玩一會 This one... This one loves a little bear time.
-天哪 -來嘛 -Oh, God. -Come on.
-我不要 -來來來 -Not me. -Come on. Come on. Come on.
來來來 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
就是這樣 你有節奏感的嘛 Oh, there it is. You've got a little bit of rhythm going on there.
看到沒你在擔心什么啊 That's it, see? What are you worried about?
她跳得多好 She moves like a gem.
-是的 -你怎么這樣啊 -Oh, yeah. -What are you like?
她喜歡轉圈 很好 看到沒 And she loves a spin. That was good, you see?
這位呢 Oh, what about this one?
在角落里不吭聲 也不動 Little silent but deadly in the corner.
-別這樣 -你要跟我跳舞嗎 -Stop it. -You going to come dancing with me?
-就一會兒 -別這樣 -Just a little something-something. -Don't.
-什么 -我不跳舞 -What? -I don't dance.
-大家都在跳 -我不跳舞 不喜歡跳 -Everybody's dancing. -I don't dance. I don't like it.
好吧 你自便 All right, make yourself useful.
來吧 Come on.
線斷了 因為魚很大 Oh, the line broke, 'cause it was a big fish.
現在跳什么哥薩克舞 What time is it? It's Cossack time!
沒錯 Oh, yes.
布魯斯 Hey, Bruce!
你們喜歡這種舞 Oh, you like it!
-很抱歉 -抱歉 -Wow, I am so sorry. -Sorry, I'm sorry.
這個纏住了 我來把它... We've got tangled here. Let me try and get this... Ow!
再說聲抱歉 你沒事吧 Again, I'm sorry. Are you all right?
我在哪 英國 Where am I? Am I in England?
我沒事...沒事 No, I'm fine. Just... fine.
我們得把這個解開 Maybe we should get these untangled.
布魯斯·加勒特 Bruce Garrett.
我叫布魯斯·加勒特 你叫... Bruce Garrett, that's me and...
-胡莉奧·馬修斯 -打印錯了 -Julio Matthews. -They printed it wrong.
不過我挺喜歡的 所以要留著它 But I like it, so I'm going to keep it.
留著吧 我覺得挺適合你的 Yeah. No, you should. I think it suits you.
有點拉丁風味 Adds Latin flavour to it.
我希望你知道 我不是想離開你的派對 I just want you to know I wasn't trying to escape your party.
我也不是 誰會離開那么棒的派對呢 No, me neither. Why would anybody want to leave that amazing party?
-我們... -好 -Uh, shall we... -Yes.
真麻煩 3D拼圖啊 Well, what a pickle, a 3-D jigsaw.
謝謝 很高興見到你 布魯斯 Thank you. Nice to meet you, Bruce.
我也是...胡莉奧 Likewise... Julio.
你知道我最喜歡這里的什么嗎 Mm. Do you know what I like best about this place?
除了免費冰櫻桃 Apart from the free glace cherries?
除了免費冰櫻桃 Apart from the free glace cherries,
他們還堅持 the fact that they still insist upon
讓我妹妹穿得像個東加的二奶 my little sister dressing up like a Tongan concubine.
不是他們堅持的 Oh, they don't insist
而且我更喜歡波利尼西亞應召女郎這種說法 and I prefer Polynesian call girl.
說說跟你新老板撞到頭的事 So talk me through head-butting your new boss.
其實是她撞到我 Well, actually, she might have head-butted me,
我們胸卡的繩子纏住了 but our lanyards tangled.
很難解開 知道嗎 There was a struggle, you know?
我們倆頭一往前 就重重地撞上了 Our heads went forward. There was a crash, wallop.
看來她給你留下了很深的印象 Mm, sounds like she made quite an impression.
-別再說這個話題了 -拜托 布魯斯 -No, no, not this again. -Oh, come on, Bruce.
你從90年代初就不提女孩了吧 You haven't even mentioned a girl since, what, the early '90s?
別說了 薩曼莎 求你了 Stand down, Samantha, please.
她跟我不是一個世界的 She is not of my world.
什么世界 "試都不試"世界 Oh and what world is that, the world of not even trying?
沒錯 "她很漂亮 我配不上她"星球 Yeah, indeed, the planet She's Beautiful, Way Out Of My League,
她還是我老板 別再想了 and also my boss, so knock it on the head.
就是寶貴的舒適地帶旁邊 Is that right next to precious comfort zone?
那個很有名的地方是吧 Oh, that well-known place.
那個你從沒踏出過一步的地方 A place you've never even stepped out of ever.
我是說 如果你真的喜歡 All I'm saying is that if you really like something,
就要行動 爭取得到 you've got to put yourself out there. Got to reach out and grab it.
櫻桃沒那么好吃 The cherries are not that delicious.
我不是說櫻桃 布魯斯 I'm not talking about the cherries, Bruce.
我可不想成為那些輪子 I would not like to be those tyres.
哈哈 真有趣 Ha-ha, yeah, very amusing!
它配有80密爾的三卡爪自動定心卡盤 It comes fitted with an 80-mil, three jaw self-centring chuck.
工具尺寸 最多八密爾 Tool size, eight mil max.
我是說 不需要更多 I mean, you'd never need any more.
-你好 這位是胡... -抱歉 各位 -Hey, hello. This is, uh, Ju... -Oh, sorry, everybody.
我來介紹一下部門的重要人物 Let me introduce you to the brains of the operation,
我們部門的領導 茱莉亞·馬修斯小姐 our head of department, Miss Julia Matthews.
抱歉 繼續吧 我坐著就行 Uh... I'm sorry. Keep going. I was just going to sit in.
很高興你加入我們 It's nice to have you with us.
-你講完了嗎 -嗯 -Are you done? -Yeah.
-有問題嗎 -它的功能是什么 -Any questions? -What's the capacity?
功能啊 Ah, capacity.
中心桿之間是250密爾 It's 250 mil between the centres.
你真的很了解你的產品 You really know your stuff.
謝謝 我喜歡車床 Thank you. Thank you. I... I love lathes.
不過我記得 我們還有宣傳視頻的 Oh, while I remember, we can also provide, um, promo videos.
是吧 布魯斯 Isn't that right, Bruce?
我覺得這臺電腦上就有 Actually, I think we've got one of those on this computer right here.
這臺沒有 我看看 Not on that one. Let me have a look.
我覺得我看到過DML立式車床那個視頻 Yeah, I think I saw the one for the DML vertical lathe on here
-前幾天看到過 -不可能 -somewhere the other day. -No.
-等等 在這 等等 -這個 -Wait, there it is. Hold on. -Is it?
是的 這個視頻就很好 Yeah, this is a really good example of the videos we can give you.
各位好 它有米漢納框架加強最大剛性 'Hello, with a Meehanite frame annealed for maximum rigidity,
每次都能完美運作 'it offers perfect jib-bed flushing each and every time.
哈斯ST30車床 'The Haas ST30 turning lathe,
能夠上下擊打 精確碾壓 'it offers precision grinding over full vertical stroke.'
我不想太快射時就會想想這個 This is what I think of when I'm trying not to ejaculate too quickly.
果嶺費付了 我們打高爾夫去吧 OK, green fees paid, let's play the game of golf game.
請幫幫我 Please help me.
你還在糾結那些球 Are you still banging on about those balls?
是的 這個飛得更遠 Well, yes, this one's going to fly further,
但這個在球穴區更易控制 but this one's going to give me more control round the green.
高雅談話結束了的話 If we've finished with the high-brow chit-chat,
我們就進行每周總結吧 can we move on please to the weekly roundup?
-好 好 -好了 女士們 先生們 -Yes, yes. -OK, ladies and gentlemen.
一周總結 和女人約會了嗎 Totals for the week, dates with a lady?
-沒有 -沒有 -Nil. -Nil.
-要到電話號碼了嗎 -沒有 -Mobile numbers acquired? -Nil.
我要到一個 是個零 I got a number. It was a zero.
艷遇呢 Ah, erotic encounters?
沒有 Nilly vanilly.
聽著 在上周日湯姆的洗禮命名儀式上 Now, listen to this. Last Sunday at Tom's christening,
我碰到了蕩婦琴姨的胸部側面 I grazed past horny Aunty Jean's side boob?
-這算嗎 -裁判 -Does it count? -Adjudicator?
-不算 -我以為能算呢 -It's a nil. -I thought I'd throw it in.
最后 除了金錢交易 Finally, have you had any contact with a member of the opposite sex
除了你們的媽媽和執勤女警 where money did not exchange hands
你們有沒有跟異性接觸過 and she looked at you for more than eight seconds
并且她看了你超過八秒 and she was not your mum or an arresting officer?
沒有 Nil.
布魯斯 Bruce?
啊沒有 當然... Mm? Well, no, obvs...
每周總結到此結束 Here endeth the weekly roundup.
快點 米奇 Hurry up, Mickey!
謝謝...非常感謝 Ah, thank you... very much.
怎么了? What is it?
-該死 沒事 別看 -怎么了 -Shit. Nothing. Please don't look. -What's wrong?
你在干什么 怎么了 What are you doing? What is it?
-別看 -她是誰啊 -Please don't look. -Who is it, hm?
同事 一起工作的一個女孩 It's just someone from work. It's a girl I work with.
-天哪 她挺漂亮的 -別看了 -Oh, my God, she's nice. -Don't look. Stop it.
-轉過來好嗎 -我要... -Hey, turn around, will you? -Oh, I would...
-要是我能夠... -你不殘... -If I was physically able... -You're not dis...
你不殘疾 蓋瑞 但你已經結婚了 You're not disabled, Gary. You're married.
那你去 去吧 Go on, then. Have a go.
你看到她了嗎她很漂亮 Did you see her? She's beautiful.
她十分 我兩分 She's like a ten. I'm a two.
八分之差 像蝴蝶和防風草一樣 That's an eight-point swing, like a butterfly going out with a parsnip.
-什么 -你知道的... -What? -Yeah. Well, you know...
好吧 我沒說這會很容易 All right, I'm not saying it's going to be easy.
你得努力 就像那個 You'll have to work at it. It's like that, um,
你給英國航空航天公司設計的機器 that machine you're on about for British Aerospace.
-PL5外圓磨床 -謝謝提醒 -The PL5 cylindrical grinder. -Thank you.
她是外圓 ?? She's the cylinder. Click-click.
你是打磨機 知道嗎 You're the grinder, mm?
磨她 Just grind her down, uh, uh, uh.
-你磨她 -我不喜歡兩指這個比喻 -You grind her down. -I don't like the two-finger bit.
讓她注意到你 布魯斯 Make her notice you, Bruce.
-你覺得我應該去打個招呼 -不是 -Think I should say hello? -Oh, don't... no.
走過去說... Go up there and say something like...
"嗨" "Hi."
祝你好運 兄弟 Woo-hoo. Good luck, mate.
-布魯斯 -啊 -Bruce. -Yes?
磨啊 Grind it.
別這樣 別鬧 Don't do that. Don't be daft.
薩爾薩 'Salsa.'
為什么偏偏是薩爾薩 Why did it have to be salsa?
"吃啊豬頭 吃你的亮片啊" 'Eat them. Eat them pig boy. Eat your sequins.
"吃啊" 'Eat them. Eat them!
"你以為自己是誰 巴利·曼尼路" 'Who do you think you are? Barry Manilow?
"吃啊..." 'Eat them... '
瑞克 看到我妹妹了嗎 Hey, Rick, have you seen my sister?
-她在那兒 -薩姆 抱歉 -She's over there. -Sam, Sam. Sam, sorry.
-給我們點時間 -我需要跟你談談 -Give us a second. -I need you.
她跟我是一個世界的 She is of my world.
-誰 -茱莉亞 我老板 -Who is? -Julia, my boss.
你踏出舒適區啦 You stepped out of your comfort zone.
我在酒吧 她進來了 我跟著她 I was at the pub. She came in. I followed her.
她在跳薩爾薩 And she was salsa dancing.
-你在開玩笑嗎 -天哪 -Are you shitting me? -Oh, my God.
她在跳基本步 跳得真好 She was doing the sweetest little basic
我都想沖進去把她攬進懷里了 and I just wanted to rush in and gather her into my arms
然后...跳舞 知道嗎 and... and... just dance, you know?
我很久沒有那種感覺了 自從... I haven't... I have not felt like that since...
-"亮片門" -自從"亮片門" -Sequin-gate. -Since Sequin-gate.
你知道那個盒子已經合上很久了 You know that box has been closed a long, long time.
我知道 發生那樣的事不太好 I know. It happened and it was bad.
你說什么 不太好 What did you say? Bad?
薩姆...他們把我襯衫上的亮片全扯下來 Sam... they ripped all the sequins off of my shirt
塞進我嘴里了 好嗎 and they stuffed them in my mouth, yeah?
他們讓我吃進去 那些大男孩讓我咽下去好嗎 And then they made me eat them. The big boys made me gobble them, yeah?
咽下去 把亮片咽下去 Just gobbling, gobbling sequins.
我吃了那些騎越野自行車的大男孩 Gobbling the big BMX boy.
我知道這件事 布魯斯 Know the story, Bruce.
-咽下去 -夠了 聽著 -Gobbling. -Enough's enough. Now, listen.
也許這是你改寫歷史的機會 Maybe this is your chance to rewrite history.
別想這件事了 Let it go.
你在想什么 What are you thinking about?
大口吃好燙 These are fucking hot in large quantities.
謝謝 Thank you.
媽的 這...這是什么 Fucking hell, what is... What is that?
-伏特加 -你怎么給我純伏特加 -Vodka. -Why would you give me neat vodka?
聽著 也許你的機會來了 Now, listen, maybe this is your way in.
你知道女孩都喜歡跳舞的男人 You know how all girls love a man who can dance.
你會跳舞 You could dance.
如果你真的喜歡這個女孩 If you really like this girl,
就用薩爾薩把她追到手 salsa your way in.
-我腳踵生火 不是嗎 -腳下生火呢 -I had fire in my heels, didn't I? -Oh, feet of flames.
-不過 我還能撿起來嗎 -容易 -Could I get it back again, though? -Easily.
有多容易 How easily?
看我怎么喝下這杯... See how I do this shot...
-像這樣容易 -這很容易啊 -That easily. -That was easy.
我能喝一杯嗎 Can I have one?
就一杯 One?
薩爾薩 Salsa.
干杯 Cheers.
薩爾薩 Salsa.
冠軍是... And the winner is...
布魯斯·加勒特 Bruce Garrett.
這是羅恩 There's Ron.
"做我的情人" "Be my Valentine."
紅發大家伙葛倫和泰德 Mm, big old ginger Glen and Ted.
鏡子 我需要幾面鏡子 Mirrors, I need me some mirrors.
好重 Ooh.
薩爾薩舞者之徒
薩爾薩舞館
能給我一杯無糖可樂 一袋炸蝦嗎 Can I have a Diet Coke and a packet of Scampi Fries, please?
我還沒關門就行 Well, you could if I wasn't closing.
還好嗎 羅恩 All right, Ron?
加勒特 Garrett.
你怎么了看起來一團糟 Well, what the hell happened to you? You look like shit.
有魅力 謝謝 Charming. Thanks very much.
你這里 《心》有客戶投訴部門嗎 You got a customer complaints department here at, er, El Corazon?
稍等 我拿張表給你 Oh, hang on, I'll get a form for you.
就是這個啊 There it is.
你怎么找到我的 How did you find me?
在網上 Internet.
-該死的網絡 -網絡 -Fucking internet. -Internet.
你近來如何 還好嗎還好吧 Oh, yeah, how have you been? Have you been all right? You good?
這里看起來還不錯 It looks nice in here.
好吧 我想我們都在努力生活 OK, I think that is us all caught up, then.
你來找我干嘛 加勒特 What do you want from me, Garrett?
沒事 路過而已 Nothing. Just passing.
看看你還有沒有在教舞蹈 Wondered if you were still teaching.
好吧 因為我想上課 Oh, right, OK, just 'cause I'm looking for a lesson.
-你在開玩笑嗎 -不是 -Are you taking the piss? -No.
不是 我想上課 清醒一下頭腦 No, I'm not. I just want a lesson, blow away the cobwebs.
-你覺得怎么樣 -我覺得薩爾薩是娘們跳的 -What do you reckon? -I reckon salsa's for pussies.
-這不是你說的嗎 -我說了 -Isn't that what you said? -Did I?
是的 你說了 Oh, yeah, you did.
我不記得了 我當時還是個孩子 I don't really remember that, 'cause I was just a kid.
-那你現在是什么 -我是個男人 -And what are you now? -I'm a man.
你是這么認為的啊 Oh, you think so, do you?
當然 這里很熱 不是嗎 Pretty certain. Hot in here, isn't it?
那看看吧 明晚七點整 We'll see. Tomorrow night, 7:00pm sharp.
入場費五磅 穿1.25英寸高跟舞鞋 Five quid on the door and I want to see you in 1 ? inch heels.
太好了 好的 謝謝你 羅恩 Brilliant. Great, all right. Thank you, Ron.
-叫我帕菲特先生 -謝謝你 帕菲特先生 -Mr Parfitt. -Thank you, Mr Parfitt.
我的炸蝦呢 Hey, where are we on the Scampi Fries?
-滾吧 -明天見 -Piss off. -I'll see you tomorrow.
來吧 寶貝們 Come here, my babies.
到爸爸這兒來 Come to Daddy.
在這兒呢 Oh, there you are.
蓋瑞來電
-謝謝 -一位 謝謝 -Thank you. -One, thank you.
橡膠底鞋 很守舊嘛 Rubber sole. Old school.
你很厲害啊 朋友 A shit load of kudos to you, my friend.
我個人更喜歡皮革底的 Personally, as a person, I love the suede sole.
我腦袋里只有皮革 I'm a suede head. People, they say,
他們說"不行 得穿橡膠的" "No, you have to be rubber sole."
我說"我喜歡皮革 就喜歡皮革" I'm like, "No, I love the suede. I love the suede. I love the suede."
你不喜歡皮革嗎我跟你說 看看 Don't you love the suede? I tell you what. Take a look at this.
你看這里 看我鞋底... If you see here, if you see where my sole is...
來吧 集合 過來 Come on, gather around. Come on.
我看出你是什么貨色了 混蛋 I see what kind of a sole you are, asshole.
-別... -今天感覺怎么樣 伙計們 -Hey, don't... -How are you today, guys?
散開一點 確保你們能看到我 Spread out a little bit. Make sure you can see me.
大家都好了吧 Everybody OK, yeah?
今晚有個新同學啊 Oh, we've got a new student with us tonight.
歡迎來到《心》 你叫什么名字 Welcome to El Corazon. What's your name?
這不重要 別管我名字 我只是路過... It's fine. Don't worry about names. I'm just passing through so...
-好 沒問題 -謝謝 -Sure, no problem. -Thank you.
我們接著昨天學 好嗎 Let's pick up where we left off yesterday, OK?
基本步 大家準備好了嗎 Basic step, everyone. Ready?
一二三 五六七... And one, two, three, five, six, seven and...
-抱歉 -怎么了 -Sorry. -Yes?
我覺得我上錯課了 I think I'm in the wrong class.
-好吧 -帕菲特先生在哪 -Right. -Where's Mr Parfitt?
-他在辦公室 知道了吧 -好的 -He's in his office, OK? -OK.
好了 我們繼續 準備... All right, let's carry on. Ready and...
他在...抱歉 他在里面干什么 What's he, um... Sorry. What's he doing in there?
-我不知道 -好吧 -I don't know. -Fine, all right.
-抱歉 繼續 -沒關系 -I'm sorry. Crack on. -That's all right.
-我們會的 謝謝 -練基本步吧 -We will, thank you. -Do your basics.
非常感謝 我們繼續 Thank you very much. Here we go.
準備 一二三 Ready and one, two, three.
有人嗎 Hello?
-你不教我嗎 -我說我開課 -Hey. Are you not teaching me? -I said I ran a class.
-沒說我自己教 -羅恩 拜托 -Didn't say I taught one. -Ron, please.
他們學的都是小兒科 我想快點復習一下 It's baby stuff out there. Just one quick freshener.
我懂了 Oh, I see.
好 OK.
我覺得我們可以上小課 I think we've done... One private lesson.
你要多少 40一小時 How much do you want? 40 for an hour?
你是這么想的 Oh, that's what you think.
你以為我坐在這里 You think I sit back here
等人進來掏錢 waiting for someone to come in and open their wallet?
是啊 不然你在等什么 Yeah, what are you waiting for?
艾麗西亞 Alicia.
-你好 -他是布魯斯·加勒特 -Hello. -This is Bruce Garrett.
-帶他出去迅速轉一圈 -不 -Take him out for a quick spin. -No.
考考他 Road test him.
艾麗西亞教高級班 Alicia teaches our advanced class,
2007年世界冠軍 跳卡巴萊風格 2007 world champion, dances cabaret style.
是 是 Oh, yes, yes.
你知道卡巴萊風格吧 You do know cabaret style, yeah?
抱歉 我知不... Sorry, do I...
你問我知不知道卡巴萊風格 You ask if I know cabaret style?
你要熱身嗎 Do you want to get warm?
你應該熱熱身 不過你看起來挺好了 You should, although you look quite warm as it is.
我聽說過你 I hear about you.
腳踵生火的男孩 The boy with fire in his heels.
那是很久以前的事了 Well, that's a long time ago.
你現在在我的地盤了 You're in my yard now.
哎喲 Oh, crikey.
-你了 -倫巴 -Ya. -Rumba!
拜托 Please.
停下 Stop it.
歡迎回來 Welcome back.
這是第一課 孩子 That's lesson one, son.
謝謝 Thank you.
好了 廢物 All right, dump truck.
你看到她今天穿什么了嗎 Have you seen what she's wearing today?
-誰 -大老板 -Who? -The big boss, yeah.
她穿了綠色裙子 漂亮吧 She's got her green number on. Isn't that nice?
她在向我傳遞信息 你明白嗎 She's trying to tell me something, you know what I mean?
她在向我傳遞信息 She's trying to tell me something.
我要在她身上留下氣味 讓她擺脫不了 I'm going to leave a stink on her that she will never get off.
我要在她身上留下篝火的氣味 你明白嗎 I'm going to be on her like bonfire smell, you know I mean?
她會洗澡換衣服 She's going to be in the shower changing her clothes.
她會說"天哪 我還能聞到他的氣味" She's going to be like, "OMG, I can still smell him."
這就對了 茱莉亞 習慣我的氣味吧 That's right, Julia. Get used to it.
它會留在你的毛孔里 I'm in your pores.
你真惡心 You're disgusting.
我覺得你對她動心的樣子真可愛 I think it's so cute when you've got a little crush.
你對她動心了 被我惡心到了 聽著 You get a little crush and you get so disgusted. Listen.
她那樣的女人會為我這樣的人 Women like that use guys like you
向你這樣的人尋求意見 to get advice about men like me.
水沒了 It's empty.
開什么玩笑 Are you kidding me?
天哪 Oh, God.
天哪 天哪 Oh, my God. Oh, God.
-天哪 你沒事吧 -沒事 -Oh, my God, are you OK? -Yeah.
-叫救護車 -不用 我沒事 -Somebody call an ambulance! -Really, no, I'm fine.
別動 別動 Don't move. Don't move. Don't move. Don't move. Don't move.
吸氣兩秒 呼氣兩秒 慢點 In for two, out for two. Slow down.
這個袋子裝過甜點嗎 -Was there a pastry in this bag?
是的 我裝過冰蛋糕 -Yeah, I had an iced bun.
我開著車... I was driving...
突然錄音機壞了 然后"砰"的一聲 and then, all of a sudden, my tape deck wasn't working and then bang!
突然你趴在我車蓋上了 我以為你被我撞死了 All of a sudden you were on the hood of my car. I thought I'd killed you.
別擔心 我沒事 Listen, don't worry. I'm fine.
沒事 你沒事 OK. OK, you're OK.
-對 我們沒事 -我沒事 -Yeah. We're OK. -I'm OK.
你還活著 You're alive!
我的意思是 我開車撞了你 I mean, I hit you with my car,
至少我可以送你回家 the least I could do is give you a ride home.
別擔心了 只是一輛小車 不是嗎 Don't worry about it. It's only a little car, isn't it?
天哪 你會告我嗎 Oh, my God. Are you going to sue me?
不會 天哪 我不會告你 No! No, gosh, no. Good Lord, I'd never sue.
我們不會...在社會大家庭里 You know we're not... As a society,
我們不會動不動告別人 知道嗎 we're not really big suers, you know?
我們不會...不會那么做 We don't... We don't do it.
天哪 你都語無倫次了 沒事吧 God, you're rambling. Are you OK?
-沒事 -你確定 -Yeah. -Are you sure?
-我沒事 -好 我叫什么名字 -No, I'm fine. -OK, what's my name?
-你記得我名字嗎 -胡莉奧 -Do you remember my name? -Julio.
罪魁禍首在這兒呢 Oh, there's the culprit.
死亡錄音帶 The cassette of death.
（西語）死亡錄音帶 La casete de muerte.
鐵托.普恩特 Ah, Tito Puente,
威利·科隆 雷·貝雷托 (古巴爵士音樂家) Willie Colon, Ray Barretto.
我們把它丟得遠遠的吧 Oh, yes, let's just put that somewhere else far, far away.
這... It's uh...
我跳薩爾薩 你知道嗎我喜歡跳薩爾薩 I salsa, OK? I'm into salsa.
其實我正要去上薩爾薩課 In fact, I was on my way to salsa class,
所以我才不惜撞死人也要到那兒 which is why I was willing to kill a man to get there,
我就是這么喜歡薩爾薩 so that's how much I like salsa.
好吧 你真的被嚇到了 All right, so you've entered total shock.
還沒緩過來嗎 Are you in a state of shock now?
我...我跳薩爾薩 I... I salsa.
好吧 你還沒緩過來 Right, sure you do.
現在我真的擔心你了 你沒事吧 Wow, now I'm really worried about you. Are you OK?
海倫跟你說打保齡球的事了嗎 Did Helen tell you about the, uh, bowling?
因為我們要打保齡球聯誼 'Cause we're going to do this whole bowling-bonding thing
不知道你想不想來 if you want to come.
來 來 當然來 Uh, yeah. Yeah, definitely. Definitely.
我喜歡打保齡球 I like bowling. I was...
我生來就是打保齡球的 I was born to bowl, really.
生來就是打保齡球的 口氣不小嘛 Born to bowl, wow. That's a big statement.
再來一次... One more time and...
一二三 五六七 One, two, three, five, six, seven.
我們再來一次 準備 一... Let's try that one more time. Ready and one...
是你 不知道你叫什么 Oh, you, whatever your name is.
我叫布魯斯·加勒特 我來學薩爾薩 My name is Bruce Garrett and I'm here to learn salsa.
很高興見到你 布魯斯 Well, very nice to meet you, Bruce.
我們在練基本步 We're walking through some basics.
準備 一二三 往旁邊 六七 Ready and one, two, three, to the side, six, seven.
往前 轉身 往后 擺動 Forward and turn. Back and shimmy.
再來一次...一二三 五六七 One more time and...one, two, three, five, six, seven.
往前 轉身 往后 擺動 Forward and turn, back and shimmy.
跳得不錯 布魯斯 Nice one, Bruce.
我們再來一次 準備五六七起 Let's try that again. Ready and five, six, seven, go!
轉身 擺動 Turn! Shimmy!
再一次 One more time.
謝謝 Yeah, thank you.
大家跳得很好 Well done, everyone. Muy bien.
下周見 謝謝大家 See you next week. Thank you very much, guys. Thank you.
我喜歡 I love this.
之前對你很粗魯 想說聲抱歉 I just wanted to say sorry for being rude to you.
的確 你對我非常粗魯 Yes, you were. You were very rude to me.
你像頭豬一樣 一頭粗魯的豬 You were kind of a pig to me, actually, a rude pig.
我跟你開玩笑的啦 天哪 I'm kidding with you. God!
我叫貝揚 很高興見到你 My name is Bejan, nice to meet you.
-我叫布魯斯 -布魯斯 你好 -I'm Bruce. -Bruce, hi.
貝揚其實是我的中間名 Bejan is actually my middle name.
我的全名是阿里·雷扎·貝揚·阿瑪札第 My full name is Ali Reza Bejan Ahmadzadeh.
有點拗口 是吧 Wow, a bit of a mouthful, innit?
是的 貝揚是英雄的意思 Yes. Bejan means hero.
-挺好的 -"布魯斯"是什么意思 -Ah, that's nice. -What does Bruce mean?
我覺得"布魯斯"源于古撒克遜語 Uh, Bruce, I think it comes from the
是灌木或樹籬的意思 old Saxon meaning bush or hedge.
我們要去泡吧你要不要... We're all hitting the club if you want to...
-好啊 -酒吧 很棒的 -Oh, right. -Boteco. It's hot shit.
舞池 可控LED 黑色玻璃上的星星 The dance floor, fully programmable LED, star on black glass.
-哇 半彈簧式的 -是的 -Wow. Semi-sprung? -Yes, please.
像在玻璃墊子上跳舞一樣 Mm, it would be like dancing on a glass pillow.
-你要來嗎給你我的號碼 -我不知道 -You want to come? Take my number. -I don't know.
-你不想要我的號碼 -不是號碼的問題 -You don't want to take my number? -Not your number.
你不想要我的號碼也沒關系 You don't have to take my number if you don't want it.
我可以掉頭走開 跟很多人說話 I can walk in the other direction. Plenty of other people to speak to.
我相信會有人想要我的號碼的 I'm sure one of them want my number.
-我不是那個意思 -我還是跟你玩的啦 -I didn't mean that. -I'm fucking with you again!
有點幽默感嘛 天哪 等著 Get a sense of humour, for God's sake! Wait there.
我直接給你號碼 好嗎 I'm going to give you my direct number, OK?
5點30到6點差一刻都可以打給我 You call me on this any time between 5:30 and quarter to six.
早上哦 我是早起的人 That's a.m. I'm a morning person.
謝謝 Thank you.
我找到羅恩·帕菲特了 I tracked down Ron Parfitt.
天哪 他怎么樣了 Oh, my God. What's he like?
幾乎沒變 粗魯討厭的老混蛋 Exactly the same. Just a horrible, grumpy, old bastard.
天哪 布魯斯 你動真格了 Holy shit, Bruce. This is huge.
是為了她嗎 Is this for her?
"是為了她嗎"是的 是為了她 "Is this for her?" Yes, it's for her.
我想請她跟我跳舞 I'm thinking about asking her to maybe dance with me.
聽起來不錯 接下來怎么辦 That sounds good, so what happens next?
-我要去邀請她 -錯 -I'm just going go ask her. -Wrong.
不不不 打好基礎之前 No, no, no. You don't go straight in with a big romantic gesture
不能直接有浪漫的行動 until you've done the groundwork.
她像一面空白的墻 布魯斯 She's like a blank wall, Bruce.
首先 你得上底漆 Firstly, you have to apply the primer,
然后內層 然后上乳膠漆 then the undercoat and then you go in with the emulsion.
什么墻可能不需要底漆呢 What kind of wall? It might not need primer.
我說真的 布魯斯 I'm serious, Bruce.
涂了內層油漆你才能約她出去 You can't go and ask her out until you've done the undercoat.
真好 太棒了 嘿 布魯斯 Fantastic, that's just tremendous. Hey, Bruce.
-嘿 -嘿 兄弟 -Hey. -Oh, hey, man.
你看起來真帥 但你知道嗎 You look nice, but you know what?
我已經有手機套餐了 I'm already, er, sorted with a phone plan.
布魯斯 你得換鞋子了 Bruce, you need your shoes otherwise
否則要錯過這輪了 you're gonna miss out on this frame.
-祝你好運 -好了 我們來吧 -Good luck. -All right, here we go.
手機店的 Phone shop.
雷暴來嘍 Here comes the dirty thunder.
大風哦 Oh, the Gaelic gale.
-看到沒我覺得擊中了七個 -讓讓 -Huh? I hit seven, I think. -Move over.
-沒關系 -加油 -Never mind. -Pump it up.
很吃驚吧 Amazing. Ah.
我能給你一點建設性意見嗎 Can I just give you a little bit of constructive feedback?
-行啊 -好 -Yeah, please do. -Oh, yeah.
我注意到你打球時有些不足 Well, uh, I've noticed a little flaw in your game.
我覺得我知道你要說什么 OK, listen, I think I know what you're going to say.
可能就是我 This probably is about me
總是把球滾進凹槽里 是嗎 continually rolling the balls into the recess gutters, isn't it?
-是的 -我覺得... -Yes, it is. -Yeah. I think...
我覺得這是我打球唯一的缺點 是吧 I think it's the only weakness in my game, you know?
是唯一的缺點 但這個缺點很大 It is. It is the only weakness, but, uh, it's a pretty major one.
-是的 很大 -我們把它改掉吧 -Yeah, it's a biggy. -So let's deal with it.
我示范給你看 來吧 Here, I'll show you. Come on.
哦耶耶 哦啦啦 Oh! Sumba, bunga, wunga!
看到沒 Did you see that?
把手指插進洞里 So you put your fingers in the holes.
不不不 別想歪 好嗎 No. No, no, no, no. No innuendo, OK?
保齡球的第一規則就是有洞和球 The first rule of bowling is there's holes and there's balls
我們都是成年人 必須克服這點 and we're all adults. We just have to get over it.
-來吧 -來 -Let's bowl. -Yup.
像抱嬰兒一樣抱住球 Hold your ball like a baby.
-像發射火箭一樣把球扔出去 -是 -Throw it like a rocket. -Yup.
像抱嬰兒一樣抱住球 Hold it like a baby.
像發射火箭一樣把球扔出去 明白 Throw it like a rocket, yeah?
明白 Yeah.
像抱嬰兒一樣抱住球 Hold it like a baby
像發射火箭一樣把球扔出去 and then I throw it like a rocket.
像抱嬰兒一樣抱住球 I hold it like a baby
像發射火箭一樣把球扔出去 and then I throw it like a rocket.
像抱嬰兒一樣抱住球 Hold it like a baby
像發射火箭一樣把球扔出去 and then I throw it like a rocket.
抱歉 抱歉 Sorry. Sorry.
我叫社會服務了 I'm calling social services.
你要叫社會服務 You're calling social services?
為什么 他在學校100米內嗎 Why? Has he been within 100 metres of a school?
到你了 茱莉亞 You're up, Jules.
去吧 胡莉奧 如果這是你的名字 Go on, Julio, if that's your name.
你只要注意用嬰兒火箭那套打球就行了 Listen, you just focus on your baby rocket big shot.
好的 Yeah.
好了 來吧 All right. Let's do this.
來吧 球寶寶 Come on, baby ball.
我要全部擊倒 I just need one strike.
你看到那個人穿的褲子了嗎 Have you seen the pants on that guy over there?
-繼續 -來吧 -Go on. -Here we go.
你最后留著那雙鞋還是還回去了 Did you end up keeping the shoes or you gave them back or?
沒有留著 還回去了 No, I gave them back.
我覺得很適合你 I thought they really suited you.
你介意我把座椅往后挪挪嗎 Ah, do you mind if I just put my seat back?
-這里挺擠的 -我腿太長了 -Oh, there's not much room here. -It's just I've got such long legs.
這樣好多了 Oh! That's better.
布魯斯 我們先把你放下 Bruce, we'll drop you off first.
運動量那么大 你一定很累了 All that exercise, you must be exhausted.
-再見 布魯斯 -再見 布魯斯 -Bye, Bruce. -See you later, Brucie.
房子不錯 我們狂歡吧 Loving the pad. Let's get this party started.
布魯斯 Bruce!
-布魯斯 -閉嘴 -Bruce! -Hey, shut up.
天哪 我以為是4號 然后又以為是14號 My God, I thought it was number 4 and then I thought it's number 14
然后以為是40號 然后我又去了14 and then I thought it was number 40 and then I went to 14
然后去了40 但是沒有40 and then I went to 40, but there isn't a 40.
-你怎么樣 -我很好 你好 -How are you doing? -I'm good. Hello.
-再來一個 -要喝點什么嗎 -One more for me. -You want a drink?
-有芬達嗎 -沒有 -Do you have any Fanta? -I do not.
真可惜 不過我帶了 That's a shame, because I do!
我去拿杯子 Ooh. Wow. I'll get glasses.
不不不 又不是婚禮 用瓶子喝 No, no, no, it's not a wedding. You drink from the bottle.
謝謝 thank you.
-干杯 -干杯 -Salamati. -Ah, salamati.
跑氣了 Urgh, it's flat.
沒有跑氣 它沒有氣 這是無氣芬達 It's not flat. It's still. It's still Fanta.
-哪有無氣芬達 -沒有無氣芬達 -They don't do still Fanta. -They don't do still Fanta.
我只能自己做 打開瓶子 放在陽臺上 I have to make my own. You just open the bottle. Put it on the balcony.
兩天后 ?地撼動房間 好了 Two days later, boom, shake the room, yes please.
準備好了嗎 你想去嗎走吧 Are you ready? Do you want to go? Let's go.
你這樣就去了 You're going like this?
是啊 這樣哪里有問題嗎 Yeah. What's the matter with this?
哪里都有問題 Well...everything
這些是什么 What are these?
-襯衫 -滌綸混合面料 -Shirts. -Polyester mix?
我想是50%滌綸 20%克林普綸 I'm thinking 50% polyester, 20% Crimplene,
5%羊毛 是嗎 5% wool, yes?
-是的 -垃圾 -Sure. -It's bullshit.
絲綢的 時髦 輕便 透氣 Silk, smart, casual, breathable.
就這件了 Yes, please.
棉質的 像海綿一樣吸汗 Cotton, soaks up sweat like a sponge.
穿上 朋友 Vest up, my friend.
亞麻的 輕便 能快速運動 華麗轉身 Linen, flyweight for quicker movements, show off those turns.
人造的 摩擦少意味著不易起皰 Synthetic, less friction means fewer blisters.
除非你喜歡起皰 你喜歡嗎 誰會喜歡 Unless you like blister. Do you like blister? Who likes blister?
-朝圣者 -沒錯 -Pilgrims. -Exactly.
誰啊 你能幫我拿一下嗎 Who's that? Can you hold that a second?
怎么了 怎么不接我電話 What's going on? Not taking my calls?
太忙了 工作太忙 Just busy. I've been busy at work.
三個字 絲絨貓 Three words. The Velvet Pussycat.
-什么 現在 -是啊 來吧 換衣服 -What, now? -Yeah, come on. Get changed.
-現在是周二晚上 -沒錯啊 -It's a Tuesday night. -Yeah, exactly.
布魯斯 你知道我讓阿曼達培養愛好 Bruce, do you have any idea how hard I've worked
有多難嗎 to get Amanda to take up a hobby.
普拉提計劃我策劃了六個月了 I've been masterminding Project Pilates for six months.
你知道我為什么那么做嗎 Why do you think that is?
整整兩小時的自由 Two whole hours of freedom,
8:30到10:30 每周一次 8:30 to 10:30, once a week.
你覺得這段時間我會干嘛 在家打飛機 What do you think I'm going to do with that time, sit indoors wanking?
這個她在家時我也可以做 I can do that when she's at home.
我太累了 你知道嗎 I'm just... I'm bushed, you know?
我想洗個澡睡覺了 I'm just going to have a bath and hit the hay.
洗澡 A bath?
不錯 有可愛的小泡泡嗎 Oh, that's nice. Will it have nice little bubbles in it?
-你在跟誰說話 -他是誰 -Who are you talking to? -Eh? Who's this?
你好 我叫貝揚 很高興見到你 Hi. My name is Bejan. Pleased to meet you.
-工作上的伙伴 -伙伴天哪 我好榮幸 -It's a mate from work. -Mate? Oh, my God. I'm honoured.
好吧 All right.
這對于我是個非常非常重要的時刻 It's a big, big moment for me.
我不打擾你洗澡了 Well, I'll leave you to your bath.
我們不是要一起洗 We weren't having a group. We weren't going to do group.
他正要走 我正要洗澡 別這樣 He was going to go and I was going to have a bath. Please don't. Don't.
別擔心 沒關系 我自己去 Don't worry. It's fine. I'll er... I'll go by myself.
-我一會兒給你打電話 好嗎 -好 -I'll give you a call later, yeah? -Yeah.
再見 蓋瑞 Bye, Gary!
他真可愛 He's cute.
還有兩件事 刮胸毛 涂棕油 Two more things, your hairy chest and a tan.
-不不不 -要的要的 -No, no, no. -Yes, yes, yes, yes.
-不不 -布魯斯 現在是哪一年 -No, no. -Bruce, what year is this?
我們回到過去了嗎 Did we just go back in time?
我們走出德勞瑞恩了嗎 Did we step out of the De Lorean?
現在是1985年嗎 這里是山古鎮嗎 Are we in 1985? Is this Hill Valley?
想想麥克弗萊 想想 Think McFly! Think!
抱歉 我只是想... Sorry, I just wanted to...
所以拿著這個... So take this...
-還有這個 -好 -and take this. -Fine.
給你十分鐘 You've got ten minutes.
快啊 馬蒂 Run for it, Marty!
顏色好深 Wow. It's so deep.
好自然 So natural.
感覺怎么樣 How do you feel?
謝謝 Thank you.
第七日 上帝對他的追隨者說... And on the 7th day, the Almighty turned to his followers and said...
-什么意思 -我們跳薩爾薩吧 -What does that mean? -Let's salsa.
-他在跟她扭屁股 -是啊 -Oh. He's grinding her batty. -Yeah, he is.
看看 Oh, look. Look.
-真滑稽 -天哪 真讓人覺得惡心 -That looks fun. -Oh my God. They make me feel sick.
薩爾薩有氧舞 Salsa aerobics?
那不是薩爾薩 那是癌癥 It's not a salsa. It is a cancer.
回休閑中心去吧 你們這群賤人 Go back to the leisure centre, you bitches!
-如果我現在有手榴彈... -閉嘴 -If I had a grenade right now... -Shut up.
-我是說... -一個中東人 -I was just saying... -A Middle Eastern man
在擁擠的夜總會談論手榴彈 talking about a grenade in a packed night club.
這會引起恐慌的 You'll start a bloody stampede.
我說如果我有手榴彈 I'm saying if I had a grenade.
-我當然沒有啊 -噓 -Of course I don't have a grenade. -Shush.
-再來一瓶芬達 -我們再喝一瓶 -Another Fanta. -Let's have another Fanta.
-嗨 伙計們 -嗨 -Hi, guys. -Hey!
-有人要跳舞嗎 -好的 請 -So who's dancing? -Oh, yes, please.
-布魯斯 -不 這曲我不跳 -Bruce. -No, I'm going to sit this one out.
-不行 來嘛 -拜托 -I don't think so. Come on. -Oh, please.
-嗨 羅恩 -嗨 你好嗎 -Hi, Ron. -Hey, are you all right?
走走走 Off. Off. Off.
什么 What?
離開舞池 別在這里跳這么糟糕的舞 Get off this fucking dance floor with your shitty dancing.
-我在跳舞 -跳舞 -I was doing the steps. -Doing the steps?
隨便哪個癟三都能跳舞 Any prick can do the steps.
那個癟三就能跳舞 That prick can do the steps.
心在哪呢 心呢 Where's the fucking heart? Where's el corazon?
-我不知道 -你說什么 -I don't know. -What's that?
-我不知道 -你不知道 -I don't know. -You don't know.
那樣的話 你怎么不滾回酒吧 Well, in that case, why don't you piss off back to the bar,
喝杯苦酒 像其他失敗者一樣看著 grab yourself a pint of bitter and watch like all the fucking losers?
別這樣 Don't.
擦干凈 Scrub it off of me.
臟臟的棕油 This filthy tan.
-重大新聞 廢物 -什么 -Big news, ball bag. -What?
挪挪 你昨晚在家打飛機時 Shift. when you were at home last night making love to your hand,
猜猜誰和性壓抑的老板娘跳迪斯科舞去了 guess who went disco dancing with the sexually-frustrated lady boss.
-誰 -我 -Who? -Me. I did.
-知道了 -天哪 她真能跳 -Yeah, got that. -Oh, my God. She can move.
她的汗不停滴下來 And the sweat dripping off of her,
像嬰兒的眼淚一樣 it was like a waterfall of babies' tears.
真有詩意 Mm, poetic.
我想我們都知道接下來會發生什么 Ah, I think we all know where this is headed.
她的身體里 Inside of her.
-你知道我的意思嗎 -嗯 -You know what I mean? -Yeah.
-為什么告訴我這些 -別裝清純了 -Why are you telling me all this? -Don't be a virgin.
-我知道你給她做了一盒磁帶 -沒有 -I know you made a play for her. -No, I didn't.
歌曲集錦錄音帶 A mix tape?
你現在成了約翰·庫薩克了是吧 Are you fucking John Cusack now?
你把它拿走了 You took it.
我不想讓你尷尬 她會當面嘲笑你的 I didn't want you to be embarrassed. She'd laugh in your face.
我為她的車做的 I made it for her car.
-還給我行嗎 -你肥壯的手臂不夠快 -Just give me it, will you? -Your big arms are too slow.
-嗨 伙計們 -嗨 茱莉亞 -Hey, guys. -Hey, Jules.
-怎么樣 -很好 很好 -How's it going? -Really good. Really good.
昨晚很有趣 對吧 Last night was fun, right?
-很有趣 -挺好的 -So much fun. -Yeah, it was good.
海倫明顯在催我們 但是... Helen was obviously trying to hustle us all, but...
是啊 昨晚過得很愉快 Yeah, it was a good night.
你的小腳丫怎么樣了 How are your little footsies?
-你知道嗎可酸痛了 -我就知道 -You know what? Pretty sore. -I'll bet they are.
我們在回家的路上去了俱樂部 We, uh, stopped off at a club on the way home.
沒錯 That's right.
我走了 有事要忙 I'm going to go. I've got things to do.
-一會見 布魯斯 -再見 布魯斯 -See you later, Brucie. -Bye, Bruce.
德魯 Drew! Ow!
媽的 Oh, shit.
媽的 Oh, shit. Oh.
-你沒事吧 -嗯 我在修指甲 -Are you all right? -Yeah, just having a manicure.
-這個你能簽一下嗎 -當然 -This came. Will you sign for it? -Sure.
你能不能...抱歉 Can you... Sorry.
-謝謝 -謝謝 -Thank you. Cheers. -Thanks.
我能不能... Can I, um...
真糟糕 Oh, this is bad.
幫幫我 Help.
-真有趣 -是啊 -That was so fun. -Yeah.
-我們應該再玩一次 -也許吧 -We should do it again. -Yeah, maybe.
這盒磁帶怎么回事 What's erm... What's with the tape?
可惡 Oh, shoot.
被你抓到了 為你的車做的 You caught me. Er, it's for your car.
天哪 你畫了鑲嵌圖案 Oh, my God. You made an inlay.
是的 Yes, I did.
現在沒人會畫鑲嵌圖案了 Nobody makes inlays anymore.
是的 這挺傻的 但我想你會喜歡 Yeah, it's just a silly, little touch I thought you'd like.
真精美 That's really... That's really nice.
現在我覺得我該送你點什么了 Now I feel like I have to get you something.
那太好了 That would be so cute.
真的很精美 謝謝 That's really nice. Thank you.
你的泡泡浴怎么樣 How was your bubble bath?
-你神清氣爽了嗎 -真經典 蓋瑞 經典 -Was it rejuvenating? -That's classic, Gary, classic.
聽著 我喜歡開玩笑 Listen, I love the craic.
有人可能會說我開玩笑上癮 One might say I'm addicted to the craic,
但現在我只想埋頭 but right now I just want to get my head down
把這桶球打進洞 好嗎 and plough my way through this bucket of balls, all right?
好嗎 Yeah?
我覺得我們又該進行每周總結了 I think we've got a new heading for our weekly roundup.
無法解釋的與強壯的外國男人的 Unexplained homoerotic encounters
同性艷遇 米奇 with rugged foreign males. Mickey?
-沒有 -我也沒有 布魯斯 -Nil. -Me, nil. Brucie?
去他媽的每周總結 Ah, fuck the weekly roundup.
去他媽的 Fuck it.
哎 她怎么了 Oh, dear. What's wrong with her?
說嘛 布魯斯 他是誰 Come on, Bruce. Who was he?
-你在瞞著我們什么 -沒什么 -What are you hiding from us? -Nothing.
性感蘇丹豐富的沐浴乳 Aw.
刺激到你敏感的皮膚了嗎 Did the sexy sultan's rich bath milk irritate your sensitive skin?
滾開 Fuck off.
你沒事吧 蓋瑞 Hey, are you all right, Gary? Gary?
-抱歉 你還好嗎 -很好 兄弟 -I'm sorry. Are you OK? -Yeah, fine mate.
-沒關系 -別走 -Yeah, forget about it. -Hey, hey, hey. Don't go.
這個是專打混蛋的球桿 Yeah, this is the one, the trusty arsehole wedge.
別...蓋瑞 別... Hey, hey. Don't... Gary, don't...
住手 蓋瑞 別這樣 Stop it. Stop. Oh! Gary! Oh! Gary, don't!
-你再跑 -蓋瑞 -You keep running! -Gary!
-好 -救命 -Right. -Help me!
第三擊 Par three!
或者應該說打混蛋的一擊 Or should I say par arsehole!
我不是故意打你的 蓋瑞 別這樣 I didn't mean to hit you, Gary! Please!
再跑 Keep running!
住手 Stop it!
-我跳舞 -前面注意 -I dance! -Fore!
我跳舞 行了吧 I dance, all right?
別再朝我擊球了 Please stop hitting balls at me.
薩爾薩 Salsa?
-穿著小小的舞鞋 -是的 -With the little shoes? -Yes.
是的 穿著小小的舞鞋跳薩爾薩 Yes, salsa with the little shoes.
為什么 Why?
為了那個女孩 I was doing it for that girl.
-哪個女孩 -蝴蝶啊 -What girl? -The... the butterfly.
《蝴蝶與防風草的故事》 The eponymous butterfly
里面的蝴蝶 from the "Tale of the Butterfly and the Parsnip".
防風草 蝴蝶 The parsnip, the butterfly.
怎么 你覺得防風草穿著小鞋跳跳舞 What, you thought the parsnip would win the butterfly
就能贏得蝴蝶的心了 by doing a bit of tiny shoe shuffle?
是啊 我知道 很傻是吧 Yes. I know. It's stupid, isn't it?
還有德魯 你記得德魯嗎 And then there's Drew. Do you remember Drew?
記得 那個混蛋 Oh, yes, that horse's arse.
是的 他也喜歡她 Yeah. Well, he likes her, too.
他可能是個混蛋 但他這方面比我在行... He might be a horse's arse, but he's better at all this than I am so...
我可能得認輸了 I might just let him get on with it.
兄弟...可能這樣最好 Yeah, mate, just... It's probably for the best.
忘了她吧 好嗎 Just... just forget about her, eh?
他回來了 He's back.
天哪 羅恩 你嚇我一跳 Jesus Christ, Ron. You fuckin' made me jump.
她是誰 布魯斯 Who is she, Bruce?
那晚俱樂部那個女孩 是她吧 The girl in the club the other night, she's the one, hm?
-不重要了 -當然不重要 -It doesn't matter. -No, of course, it doesn't matter.
所以你的臉像掉了的烤餅 That's why you've got a face like a dropped scone.
太傻了 我想讓她愛上我 It's just stupid. I wanted to make her fall in love with me.
然后來了這么個家伙 個子高 更帥氣... Mm... and then along comes this other fella -tall, better looking...
說實話 他的老二肯定很小 Let's face it. His dick couldn't be any smaller.
所以你才回來 為了女人 That's why you came back. La dona, the woman.
是因為薩爾薩 羅恩 It's salsa, Ron.
永遠都是關于女人 It's always about a woman.
我只想讓你把我變得配得上她 I just wanted you to make me good enough for her.
你為什么不站在鏡子前 Why don't you just keep standing in front of that mirror
像那晚在俱樂部那樣 and do what you did in the club the other night?
-幫個忙 跳吧 -什么 -Do me a favour and do that. -What?
拜托 你知道那晚你是怎么跳的 去感覺 Oh, come on. You know what you did. You felt it.
你想讓我現在跳 You want me to do it now?
來吧 就我倆 布魯斯 Come on. It's just us girls, Brucie.
我不想跳 I don't want to.
-他還克制著呢 -克制 -Oh, he bottles it. -Bottles?
真令人驚訝 What a surprise.
-你去哪 -來吧 我們有活要干 -Where are you going? -Come on. We got work to do.
什么活 What kind of work?
我們來喝個酒 玩個牌 We're going to get shit-faced and play board games.
-一只眼睛戴的眼鏡 -單片眼鏡 -Eye piece for one eye? -Monocle.
抱歉 我們為什么還要玩這個 Sorry, why are we doing this again?
-坐在圣誕樹上的 -仙女 -Sits on top of a Christmas tree? -A fairy.
錯 是星星 No, a star.
-時間到 -好 -That's time. -Oh, all right.
-到你了 -開始吧 -That's for you. -Go.
好 他們在伊甸園吃了這個 上帝很生氣 OK, they ate this much to God's annoyance in the Garden of Eden.
-蘋果 -蘋果 正確 -Apple. -Apple is correct.
好 他...是個演員 Oh, OK, he... Um, he's a an actor.
-他拍電影 -這個是紫色的 -He does films. -It's a purple one.
-所以呢 -你要模仿 -Yeah and? -You have to do an impression.
我不要模仿 I'm not doing an impression.
-你必須模仿 -不要 -Well, you have to. -No.
-模仿 布魯斯 -不 我做不到 -Do the impression, Bruce. -No, I can't.
-模仿啊 -不 我不會模仿的 -Just do the impression. -No, I'm not doing an impression.
-你在怕什么啊 -我不怕什么 -What are you so scared of, eh? -I'm not.
-那就模仿 -不 我不... -Just do the impression, then. -No, I'm not doing...
你為什么這么害怕別人怎么想 Why are you so afraid of what people might think?
你為什么不表現自己 Why can't you put yourself out there?
-我是說... -模仿啊 -I mean... -So do the impression.
-時間快到了 -模仿 -It's almost time. -Do the impression.
-就這樣 時間到 -他媽的模仿啊 -That's it. Time. -Do the fucking impression!
你為什么老吼我 Why are you always shouting at me?
因為你他媽放棄我了 Because you fucking quit on me.
-我沒有放棄 -你腳下擁有全世界 -I did not quit. -You had the world at your feet.
-我沒有放棄 -你離開了 不是嗎 -I did not quit. -And you walked away, didn't you?
-我沒有 -你有 -No, I didn't. -Oh, yes, you did.
你一直回來了又走 You keep swanning back in here and swanning out again.
-回來又... -他們打擊我 行了吧 -Swanning back in... -They broke me. All right?
如果你想知道 比賽那晚他們打擊我 If you want to know, the night of the competition, they broke me.
一群小混混把我打擊得沒自信心了 A gang of kids, bullies, they just... they broke it out of me.
-我不想再跳了 -幾個大男孩找你麻煩 -I didn't want to do it anymore! -Some big boys gave you a shoeing.
你是個男舞者 你以為我沒有受過氣 You're a male dancer. Do you think I never took any shit?
那你要怎么做呢 So what are you going to do about it, eh?
你要躲起來 在羽絨被下爬 Are you going to hide away, or maybe crawl under your duvet
吃著麥麗素 看《布里奇特·瓊斯》第二部 and watch "Bridget Jones Part Two" with some white Maltesers?
別這樣 Don't.
要不然呢 Then what?
-要不然呢 -我不知道 -Then what? -I don't know!
那就模仿啊 So do the fucking impression!
-跟我的小朋友打個招呼 -再一遍 -Say hello to my little friend. -Again.
-跟我的小朋友... -再一遍 -Say hello to my little... -Again!
-跟我的小... -再一遍 -Say hello to my... -Again!
跟我的小朋友打個招呼 Say hello to my little friend!
-阿爾·帕西諾 -沒錯 -Al Pa-fucking-cino -Yes!
那么...我們可以去鏡子前跳舞了嗎 So... shall we go and dance in front of the mirror?
好 Yeah.
現在才到時間 Yes. That is time.
肩膀放松 Get the shoulders. Loosen up.
就是這樣 放松 肩膀轉轉 That's it. Loosen up. Roll those shoulders. Roll them.
轉轉 轉轉 Roll them. Roll them.
鷹翅膀 Arms of an eagle.
我說鷹 不是鷺 I said an eagle, not a fucking heron.
這是鷹啊 It is an eagle.
好 再試試 牡馬腿 OK, try again. Legs of a stallion.
鷹翅膀 Arms of an eagle.
起 Go.
就是這樣 好好跳 布魯斯 That's it. Work it out, Brucie.
繼續 加勒特 Go on, Garrett.
臺下用功 臺上輕松 Takes a lot of hard work to make it look that easy.
好的 All right.
要牢記于心 Think about it all the time.
我知道你們都在等這個特別的模型 Now, I know you're all waiting for this particular model,
但我們說 車床遲來總比不來好 but as we say, better lathe than never.
好 那么... All right, so...
一二三四... One, two, three, four...
-這是什么 -什么 -What is that? -What?
-像雞的動作 -這是雷鬼 -That's chicken stuff. -It's reggaeton.
三二一 下 Three, two, one and down.
你沒事吧 You all right?
抱歉 有人來了 I'm so sorry. Someone's coming.
可以進個瘦子嗎 Room for a small one?
我有問題問你 I have a question for you.
我喜歡問題 Well, I love questions.
你喜歡拉丁音樂 So you like Latin music, huh?
-集錦音樂磁帶 -集錦音樂 是的 -The mix tape. -Oh, right, the mix, yes.
音樂上我是個正宗的拉丁男孩 Oh, I am a Latino boy big time, I am, music wise.
謝謝你聽了 我很樂意那么做 Thanks for listening to that. It was a real labour of love for me.
第一面最后一首曲子... That track at the end of side one, oh...
哎 那是...我最喜歡的曲子 Oh, shoot, that's the... That's my favourite track.
-很動感是吧 -很... -Isn't it just so er... tracky? -It's so...
這首歌最適合放在那種集錦音樂磁帶 And, er, it's the best song that you could put at the end of side one
-第一面的最后 -對 對 -on a mix tape, like that. -Yeah, yeah.
奇怪的是我每次聽那首曲子 You know what's weird is whenever I listen to that track,
我喜歡想象自己躺在壁爐前 I like to imagine myself just lying in front of a log fire,
喝著一杯...龍舌蘭 just with a glass of... tequila,
嚼著面卷餅 你知道嗎 just chewing on a chimichanga, you know?
你和布魯斯做的那個推銷 成功了 賣掉了 That pitch that you and Bruce did, you guys aced it, bam, sold.
不會吧 你開玩笑呢 Shut the front door. You're kidding.
停下火車 沒有 Stop that train. No, I'm not.
我沒有 I'm not.
我們應該一起慶祝一下 We should get together and celebrate.
-是的 -去我家 -Yes, we should. -My place.
-好 -叫外賣 -Yes. -Take-out.
-好 -叫上布魯斯和海倫 -Yes. -Invite Bruce and Helen.
好 Yeah.
我們真的應該那么做 We should absolutely do that.
-太好了 你告訴他們 -好 -Cool, so you'll tell them. -Yeah.
-太好了 -當然 我肯定會告訴他們 -Great. -Of course. I'll totes tell them.
你完全可以信任我 You can totally trust me to do that.
沒問題 That's not a problem.
-你在藏什么 -沒什么 -Hey. What are you hiding? -Nothing.
-你在藏什么 -看好了 -What are you hiding? -Behold.
圣多維多 Santo Vito.
什么不過是又一個薩爾薩之夜 What? It's just another salsa night. So what?
那又怎樣 So what?
怎樣看看上面的印章 Look at it squashy chops.
這是比賽 抱歉 It's a competition. Sorry.
你沒看到嗎你的機會來了 布魯斯 Don't you see? This is your time, Bruce.
現在是傻瓜時間 This is the Goonie time.
你知道傻瓜時間嗎 Do you know about the Goonie time?
當然知道 我的手表就是按傻瓜時間走的 Of course I know about the Goonie time. My watch runs on Goonie time.
那你就知道 那里是他們的時間 So then you know that it's their time up there,
這里是我們的時間 but it's our time down here.
你能行的 布魯斯 你能贏 You can do this, Bruce. You can win this mother-funky
你可以讓全世界看看你的真本事 and you can show the world what you're really made of.
考慮一下 我們能有什么損失呢 Think about it. What have we go to lose?
我想我可以 Yeah, I mean, I suppose I could.
布魯斯 我們波斯有句格言 Bruce, we Persians have a saying.
-我不懂波斯語 -想做就做 -I... I don't really speak Farsi. -If you want to do something do it.
不想做就別做 If you don't want to do it, don't do it.
我健身球課要遲到了 一會打給你 I'm going to be late for my ball wax. I'll call you later.
-當然 -再見 -Yeah, sure. -OK, bye.
我還能看到你 I can still see you there.
-再見 -再見 -See you. -See you later.
嗨 一二三四五 耶 Hello. One, two, three, four, five. Yes.
-你贏了 -終于 終于 -You win. -Finally. Finally.
現在你知道第一名能得到什么了吧 Now, you know what you get for first prize,
算你臭小子幸運 you lucky prick.
-我不敢想 -你能得到一個這個 -I dread to think. -You get one of these.
-這個啊 -還有... -And there it is. -And...
兩個這個 two of these.
我想你可能想要一雙80年代的廉價舊舞鞋 I just thought you might want an old pair of shitty shoes from the '80s.
我是個細心的主人 One careful owner.
謝謝 羅恩 Thanks, Ron.
你現在不會對我豎中指了吧 You're not going to try and finger me now, are you?
-你想讓我對你豎中指 -你準備好了 -You want me to try and finger you? -You're ready.
你...自由了 You... are free.
我要邀請她參加明晚的比賽 I'm going to ask her to this thing tomorrow night
如果你能來看我們 我會感到很榮幸 and I would be honoured if you would come and watch us.
我得看看日程安排 Ah, I'll have to check my diary.
謝謝 Thank you.
看看這雙鞋 Look at them.
這么軟 They're so soft
別...別聞 Don't... Don't do that.
加油 Come on.
她今天沒來上班 She's not at work today.
好 那就明天邀請她 'Fine, so do it tomorrow.'
不行 比賽在今晚好嗎 No, I can't. It is tonight, all right?
今晚我就得邀請她 I have to do it tonight.
那樣的話 你可能完了 In that case, you are a tiny bit fucked.
薩姆 拜托 我真的需要你幫我 Sam, please, I really need you to just help me.
好 照我說的做 聽我的 OK, do exactly as I say and do not deviate.
你回家 洗個澡 剃胡子 穿得帥帥的 You go home, you shower, you shave, you put on something nice.
我想就淺藍色襯衫吧 不是褲子 I'm thinking powder blue, shirt not trousers.
別穿淺藍色褲子 Do not put on powder blue trousers.
打的去她家 總有人知道她住哪 Then you get a taxi to her house. Someone will know where she lives.
到她家敲門 給她個驚喜 You knock on her door. You knock her off her feet
自信地約她晚上出去 with your confident suggestion of a night out.
她立即答應 然后你馬上帶她去俱樂部 She immediately says yes, then you whisk her off to the club.
參加比賽 贏下比賽 You dance the competition. You win the competition.
我們都喝得爛醉 然后回家 明白 We all get shit-faced, then we all go home, got it?
謝謝 薩姆 Thanks, Sam.
天哪 真好 Oh, God, I'm good.
這里人真多 我用這個吧 God, it's so busy in here. I think I'll use this one.
-好吧 廢物 -蠢貨 -All right, ball bag. -Stupid.
剛剛給茱茱發了短信 Just finishing off a little text to Julie-Jules.
我說過她給我手機號了吧 I told you that she gave me her mobile number, right?
嗯 說了好幾次 Yeah, a few times.
對了 謝謝你的集錦錄音帶 Ooh, by the way, thanks for that mixed tape.
很成功 That was a hit.
-你給她了 -是啊 她超喜歡 -You gave it to her? -Oh, yeah, she bloody loved it.
覺得很貼心 Thought it was very sweet.
我想在我第一次搞定她時就放這個 I think I'm going to put it on when we seal the deal for the first time.
一點點性感的背景音樂 制造氣氛 You know, a bit of sex-muzak, set the mood.
別嫉妒 大塊頭 Don't be jealous, big lad.
我相信她生命中還是需要一個胖子好朋友的 I'm sure she'll still have room in her life for a fat best friend.
你不了解我 You don't know about me.
我不了解什么 What don't I know?
我跳舞 I dance.
抱歉 我以為你說"我跳舞" I'm sorry, I thought you said that "I dance".
沒錯 我跳薩爾薩 Yeah, I did. I dance salsa.
-你跳薩爾薩 -是的 薩爾薩 -You dance salsa? -Yeah, salsa.
我他媽真想看看呢 I would fucking love to see that.
也許你能看到 也許我比你跳得好 Maybe you will. Maybe I'll dance you under the table.
好多少 What sort of table?
都可能 Any sort of table.
好啊 廢物 我們用男人的方式解決 All right, bum flap, let's settle this like men.
贏的人能得到茱莉亞 Winner takes Julia.
公司規則怎么辦 What about HR?
午飯時發生的 過時不計 What happens at lunch stays at lunch.
你手腕很無力 Your wrists are limp.
你老二很無力 Your dick is limp.
抱歉 Oh, sorry.
你學得挺快 You learn fast.
我跟跳得最好的人學的 茱莉亞 I learn from the best. Julia.
親愛的 Sweet, sweet,
把你的蛋蛋放在我下巴這兒 茱莉亞說 rest-your-balls-on-my-chin, Julia.
-聞聞 -不要 -Smell that. -No.
你在舔我下面嗎 Did you just lick my pussy?
是啊 味道像讓人討厭的姑娘 Yeah and you tasted like a nasty girl.
真惡心 That's disgusting.
廢物 Wanker!
這雙鞋真不適合跳這玩意 I'm wearing the wrong shoes for this shit.
媽的 What the fu...
你在哪 Where are you?
我以為你喜歡開玩笑呢 I thought you liked banter.
滾開 布魯斯 滾開 Oh, fuck off, Bruce. Fuck off.
媽的...你犯大錯了 What the... Big mistake.
那是拉拉客戶潔西的車 That's Jessie the lezzie from accounts' car.
這么肥的大腿跳這么快的步子 Quick step for such meaty thighs.
這個喜歡嗎 Ooh, ooh, do you like that?
-等等 你別帶我 -像女人一樣 -Wait, no, don't lead me! -Like a lady.
-這樣不對 你知道的 -像女人一樣 -This is wrong. You know it is. -Like a lady.
-我是男人 成熟的男人 -證明看看啊 -I'm a man. I'm a fully-grown man. -Then prove it.
那是什么 What is that?
-我的手機 -別 別 -That's my phone. -No, no.
我的手 Ooh! Oh, me blades!
我說了 比你好多少都可能 Like I said, any sort of table.
好 你贏了 Fine, you win.
我不能每天午飯時間都做這個 I can't do this every fucking lunch.
不意味著她會選擇你 布魯斯 Doesn't mean that she's going to pick you, Bruce.
她不會選你而不選我 那樣太傻了 She wouldn't pick you over me. That's just bad maths.
-她是個聰明的女孩 -也許吧 -She's a clever girl. -Probably right.
你長得帥 腿又長又有型 You're quite good-looking. You've got lovely, long legs.
-是啊 -有好車 -Yeah. -Nice car.
-很好的車 -但少了點什么 -Great car. -But there is something missing.
我有你沒有的東西 你知道是什么嗎 I have got something that you don't have. Do you know what that is?
2型糖尿病 Type 2 diabetes.
心 Heart.
心 Corazon.
我是布魯斯·加勒特 我是薩爾薩舞者 You know, I am Bruce Garret and I am fucking salsa.
起來吧 廢物 Get up, bum flap.
你怎么對以傻子命名的稱呼耿耿于懷啊 How can you take something so seriously that's named after a dip?
-襯衫不錯啊 -謝謝 -Oh, nice shirt. -Thank you.
-進來吧 -不用了 等等 聽我說 -Come in. -No, wait, wait. Please.
我跳舞 跳薩爾薩 有個叫圣多維多的俱樂部 I dance. I dance salsa and there is this club called Santo Vito...
-布魯斯 -聽我說完 -Bruce. -No, please
我喘不過氣來 太緊張了 I can hardly breathe. I'm so nervous.
呼吸急促 I'm hyperventilating.
我好像能看到蒼蠅 I feel like I can see flies.
-我不... -我開門見山了 -I don't... -Let me cut to the chase.
如果你今晚有空 我想帶... If you're not doing anything tonight, I would love to take...
-當然了 -布魯斯 -Of course. -Bruce?
-怎么了 布魯斯 -當然 這... -What's wrong, Bruce? -Of course, this is...
-布魯斯... -抱歉 -Bruce... -I'm sorry.
什么意思布魯斯 怎么了 What do you mean?
等等 布魯斯 No, Bruce, what? Wait. Bruce.
回來 布魯斯你去哪... Come back. Bruce? Where are you go...
天...天哪 你在干嘛 Oh, my... Oh, my God. What are you doing?
拜托 你懂的 Come on. You know.
我懂什么我懂 I know? What do I know?
要不我們跳過晚餐 直接吃布丁吧 Let's say we skip dinner and go straight to pudding.
你在開玩笑嗎 Are you kidding?
對對 只是個玩笑 Yeah. Yeah, totally kidding.
快把褲子穿上吧 Just focus on putting your pants back on.
我沒有開玩笑 是這樣的 我是這樣想的 OK, I'm not kidding. Here's the thing. This is where I'm at.
我想對你坦白 因為我覺得你值得 I just want to be honest with you because I think you deserve that.
我要說出來 I'm just going to say this.
我要趁我有勇氣時說出來 I'm just going to blurt it out before I lose my nerve.
-天哪 -美利堅合眾國的茱莉亞·馬修斯 -Oh, my God. -Julia Matthews of America...
如果你能讓我上你 我將不勝榮幸 I would be honoured if you would let me fuck you.
-說真的 -我就是想... -Really? -I just want to...
我就是想這么做 I just want to... I just want to do it.
天哪 Oh, my God.
起來出去 Just get up and just get out, please.
-什么 -出去 -What? -Just get out.
等等 你在開玩笑吧 Wait. Is this banter?
真不敢相信你脫了褲子 I can't believe that you just dropped trou
引誘你老板 and propositioned your boss.
-你是認真的嗎 -這需要勇氣 -Did you really just do that? -It was an act of boldness.
等等 你沒告訴布魯斯和海倫今晚過來 Wait, did you not tell Bruce about tonight, or Helen?
我有沒有告訴布魯斯和海倫 Did I tell Bruce and Helen?
這都是你計劃中的 Was this all part of your plan?
我不...可能說了 我覺得我沒提 I can't... I might have. I don't think I mentioned it.
好了 談話到此結束 All right, this conversation is definitely over.
穿上你的意大利鞋 Just please take your little Italian shoes
拿上你的布丁出去吧 and your pudding and just get out.
我能不能說你犯了個很大的錯誤 Can I just say I think that you are making a big mistake?
我周一要把你調去塑料模具部 I'm going to have you transferred to plastic mouldings on Monday.
胡扯 這樣調動不好... Oh, that's bullshit! That's just a bad managerial...
知道嗎那盒狗屁集錦錄音帶不是我做的 You know what? FYI I didn't make that shitty mix tape.
抱歉 茱莉亞 I'm sorry, Julia.
我剛剛說的話現在看來很傻 I said some things, which may now seem foolish.
好吧 我說實話 我奶奶死了 OK, I'm... I'm going to be honest. My granny died.
我發誓 德魯 如果你15秒內還不走 I swear to God, Drew, if you're still there in 15 seconds,
我就用你的布丁讓你閉嘴 I'm going to take your pudding and shove it right up your ass.
送給"胡莉奧" 愛你的布魯斯 Uh...
布魯斯 Bruce.
歡迎來到今晚的圣多維多薩爾薩比賽 開始吧 Welcome tonight to the Santo Vito salsa espectaculo. Let's go!
離大賽開始還有大概一個小時 We're about an hour away from the main competition event.
你喜歡嗎 You like it?
不太喜歡 Not really my thing.
你不試試怎么知道不喜歡 How do you know you don't like it unless you try it?
很多事我都沒有試過 兄弟 A lot of things I haven't tried, mate.
我沒試過亂倫 但我確定我不會喜歡 I haven't tried incest, but I'm pretty sure I wouldn't like it.
亂倫和薩爾薩是兩碼子事 相信我 Incest and salsa are two very different things, trust me.
布魯斯 聽到回個電話 Bruce, call me when you get this.
我想確定你沒事 I want to know you're all right.
-他沒接 -他可能在哪哭呢 -He's not picking up. -He's probably crying somewhere.
某個安靜干燥的地方 Somewhere quiet and dry.
是我我就會這么做 That's what I would be doing.
我想我知道他在哪 I think I know where he is.
-能借個球桿嗎 -請自便 -Can I borrow a racket? -Help yourself.
事情怎么樣了 So how did it go?
我穿著鑲嵌黑色萊茵石的絲綢襯衫 I'm wearing a silk shirt studded with jet-black rhinestones
在黑暗中拼命開車 driving balls out into the darkness.
你覺得事情怎么樣了 How do you think it went?
那怎么辦 你不跳舞了 So now what? Are you going to stop dancing?
-我跳舞是為了她 -是嗎 -I was only doing it for her. -Were you?
所以你又要放棄 So, what, are you going to give it all up again,
你唯一擅長的事了 the only thing you're good at?
事實上那是你唯一擅長的 Literally the only thing you've ever been good at
并非毫無意義的事 that wasn't shit and totally pointless.
好 我來說說 Oh, OK, fine. Here we go.
隨便說幾個 猜謎語 切烤肉 Just off the top of my head, quizzes, carving Sunday roasts,
玩魔方 魔術球 the Rubik's Cube, the Rubik's Sphere.
魔棍 辨認世界各國國旗 The Rubik's Snake, flags of the world,
開車出國 辨認著名水壩 driving abroad, famous dams,
根據輪廓辨認狗 你知道嗎 identifying dogs by their silhouettes, you know?
辨認非洲貨幣 我還能繼續說 African money. I could go on.
你在浪費生命 You're wasting your life.
你知道什么你都35歲了 What do you know? You are 35 years old.
還在做草裙舞女郎 And you are working as a hula girl.
抱歉 是草裙舞婦女 Oh, sorry, no, hula woman. Oh!
-滾開 布魯斯 -你才滾開 -Fuck off, Bruce. -You fuck off.
-好球 -謝謝 -Good shot. -Thanks.
你得跳舞 布魯斯 You need to dance, Bruce.
你迷失自我了 你得跳舞才能找回自我 You were lost. This is your chance to get back.
-我沒有舞伴 -你有 -I don't have a partner. -Yeah, you do.
-你 -我還會跳 -You? -I've still got it.
很好 That's pretty good.
還記得以前的套路嗎 Remember the old routine?
別這樣 你敢 Don't. Don't do that. Don't you bloody dare.
別激我 Don't evoke it.
霹靂 霹靂 霹靂貓 Thunder, Thunder, Thunder, ThunderCats! Ho!
大家掌聲送給蓋斯和凱特 'Yes, please, give it up for Gaz and Kate.'
帥氣熱辣 迎面走來性感舞者 Salt and pepper, here comes the hot stepper.
好嗎 好嗎 蓋瑞 All right? All right, Gal?
嗨 海倫 謝謝你能來 Hey, Helen, thanks for coming.
媽的 你看起來很棒啊 Fuck me, you look great.
-羅恩呢 -他很忙 抱歉 -Where's Ron? -He was busy. I'm sorry.
布魯斯 別管羅恩了 Bruce, forget Ron.
你看起來真棒 比比吉斯樂隊還棒啊 You look so good you could be fucking Bee Gee.
看看這對 我看好他們 'Oye, look at this. Me la rebanco.
別激怒她哦 'Don't ruffle her feathers.'
你們得下臺了 You have to go.
我說的就是 我們進入下一輪吧 'Just what I'm talking about. Let's go through to the next round.
祝賀 祝賀 祝賀 'Celebremos. Celebremos. Celebremos.
請選手們進入舞池開始第四輪 'Can we please have the couples to the dance floor for heat four? '
-準備好了嗎 -沒有 -Are you ready? -No.
我也沒有 加油 走吧 Me neither. Come on. Let's go.
借過 I'm sorry.
-開心嗎 -嗯 -Happy? -Yeah.
笑笑 挺胸微笑 Big smile, tits and teeth out.
開始吧 'Let's go! '
我說的就是這個 'That's what I'm talking about! '
天哪 Holy shit.
是啊 天哪 Yes, holy shit.
看看 熱舞的腳 'Look at this. The feet of fury.'
再見 朋友們 Hey, adios, my friends.
抱歉 你們得下臺了 I'm sorry. You have to go.
下臺嘍 Time to go.
抓住她 盡情跳吧 穿藍色衣服的 'Catch her. Have a ball. In blue, azul.
我們的半決賽選手出現啦 'We have our semi-finalists here.'
太棒了 'Amazing!
太鼓舞人心了 'Inspirational! '
-好了 我想要回來 -什么 -OK, I want it back. -What?
-說吧 在哪 -什么在哪 -Come on. Where is it? -Where's what?
你把它怎么了 藏哪了 What have you done with it? Where have you hidden it?
-在這個口袋 -別這樣 -Is it in this pocket? -Don't.
-在這個口袋 -別亂摸 -It's in this pocket. -Don't muck about.
-你把它怎么了 -什么啊 -What have you done with it? -What?
我剛剛看得擯住了呼吸 You took my breath away in there
我想把呼吸要回來 and I want it back.
哈哈 很有趣 Ha-ha! Very funny.
布魯斯 我第一次見到你時 Bruce, when I first met you,
你就像個"嘶嘰咕哩" you were like a sangeh ghohi.
"嘶嘰咕哩" Mm, sangeh ghohi.
"嘶嘰咕哩"是什么意思 What does it mean, sangeh ghohi?
一塊大圓石 上面一坨屎 It's like a large round stone with some shit on it.
現在你卻成了這個時代的人 But now... you have become of the age.
你是個男人 布魯斯 You are a man, Bruce.
是的 Yeah.
我想是的 Yeah, I suppose I am.
現在除了呼吸 你還偷走了我的心 And now you have stolen my heart as well as my breath.
你把這些都藏著掖著呢 Where do you keep hiding these things?
-我得出去了 -是的 去吧 -I should get back out there. -Yes. Yes, you should.
去吧 布魯斯 You go, Bruce.
把男人 女人 小孩都秒殺了 Go and kill them all, man, woman and child.
我不會殺小孩的 I'm not going to kill a child.
好 走吧 OK. Go!
你有口香糖嗎 Do you have a Tic Tac?
音樂 樂師 這些人呢 'Musica, maestro! What about these guys?
這些人跳得怎么樣呢 'What about these guys?
嘿 現在 'Hey, now.'
不不不 下去 Oh, no, no, no. Get off.
-抱歉 朋友們 -我們跳吧 -'I'm sorry, friends.' -Let's go.
嘿 你懂的 'Hey, you dig it!
薩爾薩的火焰越來越旺 'And here is fanning the flames of salsa.'
我們跳吧 Let's go!
-真棒 -加油 布魯斯 -Yes! -Come on, Bruce!
雙重快樂 'Double pleasure.
真是出乎意料 'Wow, that's unexpected.'
你現在在我的地盤了 You're in my yard now.
我們的決賽選手出現了 'We have our finalists! We have our finalists.'
愛你 布魯斯 Oh, love you, Bruce.
-歡呼吧 來吧 -那是我最好的朋友 -'Let's hear it. Come on.' -That's my best mate.
蓋瑞 威士忌 大杯的 Gary, whisky, large.
你能贏的 布魯斯 You can win this, Bruce.
我拼盡全力了 I haven't got much more left.
-喝吧 喝吧 -不要 我不想喝 -Drink it. Drink it. -No, I don't want it.
猛虎的眼睛 布魯斯 猛虎的眼睛啊 Eye of the tiger, Bruce. Eye of the tiger!
女士們先生們 舞池交給你們了 'Ladies and gentlemen, the floor is yours.'
我覺得我得做點努力了 Yeah, I thought I'd make an effort.
我跟德魯什么都沒有 Me and Drew wasn't anything.
什么事也沒有 That's not anything.
很好 Good.
我想謝謝你為我做了集錦錄音帶 I just wanted to say thank you for the mix tape.
小事一樁 不過鑲嵌裝飾花了很久 It's no big deal, although the inlay, that took ages.
鑲嵌裝飾很棒 書寫很棒 Great inlay. Excellent penmanship.
-謝謝 -真的 -Thank you. -Really.
是的 我用了很好的鋼筆尖 Yeah, I used a very fine nib
0.4密爾 很小 可能就是人頭發絲的寬度 0.4 mil, it's tiny. It's probably the width of a human hair.
我不知道你是跳薩爾薩的 無意冒犯 So I didn't have you down as a salsa guy. No offence.
沒錯 Right, yes.
我小時候跳舞 很喜歡跳 I was a dancer when I was a kid and I loved it
后來發生了很糟糕的事 一切都變了 and then this shit thing happened to me and everything changed...
直到遇見你 你激勵了我 until I met you and you inspired me,
于是我又開始學跳舞 so I learnt to dance again.
我重學了以前所有的舞步 I re-learnt all the old steps.
我找到了以前的老師 羅恩·帕菲特 他... I tracked down my old teacher, Ron Parfitt who's just...
他是個非常可怕的人 He's a horrible, horrible human being.
我剃了胸毛 去了幾個很好的俱樂部 I shaved my chest. I went to some amazing clubs.
我遇到了幾個很好的人... I met some amazing people and now...
最后我感覺找回了自我 finally I feel like me again,
而這正是我一直想要的 which is what I always wanted.
知道嗎感覺找到了自我 You know? To... feel like myself.
-你剃了胸毛 -是的 剃了胸毛... -You shaved your chest? -Yeah, I shaved my chest, and...
一直很癢 it's very itchy, all the time.
好了 請關掉音樂 樂師 'OK, kill the musica, please, maestro.
女士們先生們 圣多維多決賽開始 'Ladies and gentlemen, let's go, the Santo Vito final! '
我在想也許你... I was wondering perhaps you would...
好 我跟你跳 Yes, I'll dance with you.
-嗨 -嗨 -Hi. -Hi.
-你想讓我來帶嗎 -不用 我來帶吧 -Do you want me to lead? -No, no, I'll be all right.
其實你來之前我跳得挺好的 I was actually doing quite well until you turned up.
可能會被取消資格 Probably be disqualified.
好了 朋友們 'Yes, friends. Oye mi amigo.
現在是決賽了 朋友們 'This is the final, friends.
讓他們感受到你們 'Let them feel you. Let them feel you.'
圣多維多 我們的冠軍 'Santa Vito, our winners! '
-我們沒贏 -下次吧 -I don't think we won. -Maybe next time.
太棒了 Fab. That was amazing.
-嗨 我是薩姆 -嗨 薩姆 -Hi, I'm Sam. -Hi, Sam.
小姐 加勒特先生 Scusi, senor Garrett.
請求進入你的舞池 Permission to come on to your dance floor.
同意 帕菲特先生 Granted, Mr Parfitt.
我不了解你 但該有點愛意了 'I don't know about you, but it's time for some love.
跳吧 來 我們跳舞吧 'So demonstrate. Come on. Let's go.'
跳得真好 Hey, good work.
跳得真棒 Well done.
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